Indlela yokuxosha indoda ethathekile: Amasu nezincomo
Ukuthatheka kwendoda Kungase kucindezele futhi kukhathaze kulabo abaseduze nawe. Ngezinye izikhathi lokhu kuziphatha kungadlulela ngalé kwalokho okubhekwa “njengokuvamile” futhi kube isimo esishaqisayo. Indlela yokubhekana nale nkinga ngempumelelo futhi uphephile? Kulesi sihloko, sizohlola amasu ahlukahlukene kanye nezincomo zobuchwepheshe zokushayela indoda ekhathazekile. Sizocabangela ithoni engathathi hlangothi kanye nenhloso edingekayo ukuze sibhekane nale nkinga ebucayi futhi sinikeze izixazululo ezingokoqobo. Hlala ubukele njengoba sizodabula imihlahlandlela emikhulu esizoyilandela kulo mongo ongezansi.
1. Thola izimpawu zokuthatheka endodeni
Kithina, kubalulekile ukunaka ukuziphatha okuthile namaphethini okucabanga. Izinkomba ezilandelayo zingakusiza ukuthi unqume ukuthi ngabe kukhona yini okujabulile ngawe noma enye into:
- Ukushintsha okungazelelwe kokuziphatha: Uma ubona ukuthi indoda ikhombisa ushintsho olukhulu ekuziphatheni kwayo, kungase kube uphawu lokuthatheka. Ngokwesibonelo, ungase ube nolaka, umona, noma ulawule.
- Ukunaka ngokweqile nezipho: Ukuthatheka ngokweqile kungazibonakalisa ngokubonisa uthando ngokweqile nezipho. Uma indoda ibonakala ihlale ifuna ukukuhlaba umxhwele noma ikweqise ngokubonisa kwayo uthando, kungase kube uphawu lokuthatheka.
- Ukulandela umkhondo nokuhlukunyezwa: Indoda ethathekile ingakulandela, mathupha naphakathi amanethiwekhi omphakathi. Angase abonise ukuziphatha okuhlukumezayo, okufana nokushaya ucingo ngokuphindaphindiwe, ukuthumela imilayezo njalo, noma ukuvela ngokungalindelekile ezindaweni lapho ukhona. Lokhu kuwuphawu olucacile lokuthatheka futhi kufanele kuthathwe ngokungathi sína.
Ukukhathazeka kungaba yingozi kubo bobabili abathintekayo, ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukubhekana nakho ngendlela efanele. Uma ucabanga ukuthi kukhona umuntu okuthanda kakhulu, kuyanconywa:
- Beka imingcele ecacile: Khuluma nemikhawulo yakho ngokucacile nangokuqinile. Yazisa indoda ukuthi ukuziphatha okuthile akwamukelekile futhi ukuhlonipha yakho isikhala somuntu siqu.
- Funa ukwesekwa: Uma ukulangazelela kuqhubeka noma kuba kubi kakhulu, cabanga ngokufuna ukusekelwa kubangani, umndeni, noma ochwepheshe. Bangakunikeza izeluleko ezengeziwe nesiqondiso.
- Cabangela izinyathelo zomthetho: Ezimweni ezimbi kakhulu zokuthatheka, kungase kudingeke ukuba kufuneke izinyathelo zomthetho ezifana nencwadi evimbelayo. Uma uzizwa usengozini noma uhlukunyezwa, ungangabazi ukuxhumana neziphathimandla ezifanele.
Khumbula ukuthi ukuthatheka kuyinkinga enkulu futhi akufanele kuthathwe kalula. Uma unomuzwa wokuthi usesimweni esiyingozi, ungangabazi ukufuna usizo futhi uthathe izinyathelo zokuzivikela.
2. Linganisa izinga lengozi elimele ukuthatheka ngokweqile
Kithina, kubalulekile ukucabangela izici ezihlukahlukene futhi silandele indlela ehlelekile. Ngezansi umhlahlandlela Igxathu emvakwe gxathu okuzokusiza ukuthi uhlole lesi simo futhi unqume izinga lobungozi:
- Thola imikhuba ekhathazayo: Yenza uhlu lwezenzo ezicindezelayo ezikhona kumuntu okukhulunywa ngaye. Lezi zindlela zokuziphatha zingase zihlanganise imicabango ephikelelayo, ephindaphindayo noma engenangqondo, kanye nemikhuba noma imikhuba eyimpoqo.
- Linganisa imvamisa nobude besikhathi: Inquma imvamisa lapho ukuziphatha okukhathazayo okwenzeka khona nokuthi singakanani isikhathi umuntu asichitha ekwenza. Lokhu kuzokunikeza umbono wokuqina nomthelela abanawo empilweni yabo yansuku zonke.
- Hlaziya izinga lokuphazamiseka: Qaphela ukuthi ukuziphatha okucindezelayo kuyithinta kanjani imisebenzi yomuntu yansuku zonke. Uma i-obsession iphazamisa kakhulu ikhono lakho lokusebenza emsebenzini, esikoleni, noma ebudlelwaneni bakho bomuntu siqu, kungenzeka kumelele izinga eliphakeme lengozi.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi ukuhlola izinga lengozi yokuthatheka kudinga ulwazi olukhethekile. Uma ungazethembi noma ungenakho okuhlangenwe nakho kulesi sihloko, kuyatuseka ukuthi ufune usizo lukachwepheshe wezempilo yengqondo. Bazokwazi ukwenza ukuhlola okunembe kakhudlwana futhi bakunikeze izincomo ezifanele.
Khumbula ukuthi icala ngalinye lihlukile futhi lingahluka kuye ngezimo ngazinye. Lo mhlahlandlela ukuhlinzeka ngesisekelo sokuqala, kodwa kufanele uhlale ukhumbula ukuthi uchwepheshe kuphela ongakunikeza ukuxilongwa okunembile nokuqondene nawe. Ungangabazi ukufuna usizo uma ucabanga ukuthi wena noma othile omaziyo ubhekene nokuthatheka okungase kube yingozi.
3. Qonda izinto ezingaba yimbangela yokuthatheka emadodeni
Kithina, kubalulekile ukuhlaziya izici ezihlukahlukene ezingase zibe nomthelela kulesi simo. Ngezansi, kuzovezwa izimbangela ezintathu ezingase zibe ne-obsession emadodeni:
1. Estrés y ansiedad: Ukucindezeleka nokukhathazeka yizisusa ezivamile zokuthatheka emadodeni. Ukusebenza ngokweqile, ukucindezela komphakathi, nemithwalo yemfanelo yomkhaya kungaholela emazingeni aphezulu okucindezeleka, okungaholela emikhubeni yokucabanga nokuziphatha ngokweqile. Kubalulekile ukuthuthukisa amasu okulawula ukucindezeleka, njengokuvivinya umzimba njalo, ukuzindla, nokufuna ukusekelwa kochwepheshe.
2. Ukuzenyeza: Ukuzinyeza kungase kube imbangela ecashile yokuthatheka emadodeni. Ukuzizwa untula ukuzethemba noma umbono ongemuhle ngawe siqu kungaholela esidingweni sokulawula nokuphelela ngokwedlulele, okuzibonakalisa ngokuziphatha okucindezelayo. Kubalulekile ukusebenzela ukuthuthukisa ukuzethemba ngokwelashwa kwengqondo-yokuziphatha noma imisebenzi ekhuthaza ukuzinakekela kanye nokuzamukela.
3. Izinkinga zempilo yengqondo: Izinkinga ezithile zempilo yengqondo, njenge-obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), zingaba imbangela eqondile yokuthatheka emadodeni. Lezi ziphazamiso zibonakala ngokuba khona okuphindaphindiwe kwemicabango ecindezelayo kanye nokwenziwa kwemikhuba eyimpoqo ukuze kudambise ukukhathazeka. Kulezi zimo, kubalulekile ukufuna usizo lwezokwelapha olukhethekile futhi ulandele ukwelashwa okunconyiwe, okungase kuhlanganise ukwelashwa kwengqondo-yokuziphatha, imithi noma okunye ukungenelela kokwelapha.
4. Beka imingcele ecacile neqinile ukuze ugweme indoda ethathekile
Ukuze ugweme indoda ethathekile, kubalulekile ukubeka imingcele ecacile neqinile. Le mikhawulo kufanele ikhulunywe ngokuqondile nangokungaguquki. Kubalulekile ukuthi umuntu othathekile aqonde ukuthi ukuziphatha kwakhe akwamukeleki nokuthi kufanele ahloniphe imingcele ebekiwe. Ngezansi amanye amasu okufeza lo mgomo:
1. Ukuxhumana okuqondile: Kubalulekile ukukhuluma ngokucacile nangokuqinile nomuntu othathekile, ukuveza ngokucacile lokho ukuziphatha nezenzo ezingeke zibekezelelwe. Sebenzisa ulimi lokugomela nolungenalo ulaka, ukwenze kucace ukuthi inhlonipho iyadingeka futhi uveze imiphumela ecacile yokungahloniphi imingcele.
2. Ukusungulwa kwemithetho nemiphumela: Chaza imithetho ethile okufanele iyilandele indoda ethathekile futhi iveze imiphumela yokwephula leyo mithetho. Kubalulekile ukuthi le mithetho ibe ngokoqobo futhi isebenziseke. Imiphumela kufanele ihambisane futhi isetshenziswe ngendlela efanele. Isibonelo, uma owesilisa othathekile ethumela imilayezo noma amakholi angafuneki, umthetho ungase ube ukuthi inombolo yakhe yokuxhumana izovinjwa futhi umphumela ungase ube umkhawulo wokufinyelela ekuxhumaneni.
3. Ungavumeli ukuxhashazwa ngokomzwelo: Kujwayelekile ukuthi owesilisa othathekile azame ukulawula imizwa yakhe ukuze athole lokho akufunayo. Kubalulekile ukuhlala uqinile futhi unganikezeli kulolu hlobo lokukhwabanisa. Gcina isikhundla esicacile nesiqhubekayo, uqinisa imikhawulo emisiwe futhi ubonise ukuthi ukuxhaphaza ngokomzwelo akuvunyelwe. Uma uzizwa usongelwa noma usengozini, kubalulekile ukufuna ukwesekwa kochwepheshe noma kwezomthetho.
5. Khuluma ngokugomela nangokuqondile ukuze ubeke imingcele efanele
Uma kuziwa ekubekeni imingcele efanele, kubalulekile ukuxhumana ngokugomela nangokuqondile. Ukuxhumana ngokuqiniseka kuhilela ukuveza izidingo zethu, izifiso kanye nemingcele ngendlela ecacile nenenhlonipho, ngaphandle kokuhlasela noma ukunyathela amalungelo abanye. Ngalo mqondo, kubalulekile ukusebenzisa ulimi olucacile nolufushane, ukugwema ukungaqondakali nokucabangela.
Ukuxhumana ngokugomela nangokuqondile, amasu amaningana asebenzayo angasetshenziswa. Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuqaphela imizwelo nemicabango yethu lapho sibeka imingcele. Lokhu kuyosenza sikwazi ukuveza imizwa yethu ngokucacile nangokuzola, sigweme ukusabela ngokuxhamazela noma ukuhlukumeza.
Esinye isici esibalulekile sokuxhumana ngokugomela ukusebenzisa elithi "Mina" esikhundleni sokuthi "wena." Esikhundleni sokusola noma ukusola omunye umuntu, kuphumelela kakhulu ukuveza indlela esizizwa ngayo nalokho esikulindele. Ukwengeza, kubalulekile ukucacisa futhi unikeze izixazululo eziphathekayo nezifinyelelekayo. Isibonelo, esikhundleni sokuthi, "Uhlala ungenza ngilinde," ungathi, "Ngifisa sengathi singafika ngesikhathi kuma-aphoyintimenti ethu."
6. Gwema ukuthintana nokusebenzelana nendoda ethathekile
Ngezinye izikhathi, singase sihlangane nabantu abathatheka ngokweqile abangaba usongo ekuphepheni kwethu nasenhlalakahleni yethu. Ukuze ugweme ukuthintana nokusebenzelana nalezi zinhlobo zabantu, kubalulekile ukucabangela izinyathelo zokuphepha. Nawa amasu ongawalandela:
1. Gcina ibanga elibonakalayo: Uma uhlangana nomuntu othathekile, zama ukuhamba ibanga elide ngangokunokwenzeka. Gwema izindawo lapho wazi khona ukuthi lo muntu angaba khona futhi, uma kungenzeka, shintsha izinqubo zakho ukuze ugweme ukuhlangana naye. Uma uzithola usesimweni esingakhululekile, funa usizo futhi ucele ukuba khona kwabanye abantu.
2. Khawulela ulwazi lomuntu siqu: Kubalulekile ukuqaphela lapho wabelana ngolwazi lomuntu siqu nabantu ongabazi noma nabantu obajwayele ababonisa ukuthatheka okungafunwa. Unganikezi imininingwane ngendawo ohlala kuyo, amashejuli noma imisebenzi yansuku zonke. Gcina ukulawula amanethiwekhi akho omphakathi futhi ubeke umkhawulo wokuthi ubani ongafinyelela iphrofayela yakho noma abelane ngolwazi lwakho lomuntu siqu.
7. Gcina ibanga elingokoqobo nelingokoqobo ukuze uzivikele
Phakathi nobhubhane lwe-COVID-19, ukugcina ibanga elingokoqobo nelokubona sekubalulekile ukuze uzivikele wena nabanye ekuthelelekeni. Ngezansi ezinye izinyathelo ezingathathwa ukuze kuzuzwe lo mgomo:
– Gwema ukuthintana ngokomzimba: Ukugcina ibanga okungenani elingamamitha ama-2 ukusuka kwabanye abantu kubalulekile ukunciphisa ingozi yokudluliselwa kwegciwane. Lokhu kusho ukugwema ukubingelela ngokuqabula noma ukuxhawula, kanye nokuhlala kude nezixuku.
– Utilizar herramientas tecnológicas: Esikhundleni sokuhlangana mathupha, ungasebenzisa amathuluzi obuchwepheshe atholakalayo ukuze ubambe imihlangano ebonakalayo, izinkomfa, noma okokufundisa okuku-inthanethi. Amapulatifomu afana ne-Zoom, i-Skype noma I-Google Meet Bavumela ukuxhumana okuphumelelayo kude.
– Qaphela ezinkundleni zokuxhumana: Endaweni ebonakalayo, kubalulekile futhi ukugcina ibanga. Gwema ukwabelana ngolwazi lomuntu siqu olubucayi, njengezinombolo zocingo noma amakheli, ezinkundleni zokuxhumana. Ngaphezu kwalokho, kubalulekile ukuqapha lapho uxhumana ezinkundleni zokuxhumana futhi ungangeni ekusabalaleni kwezindaba ezingamanga noma ulwazi olungaqondile mayelana naleli gciwane.
8. Funa ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo futhi wabelane ngesimo nabantu obathembayo
Ezikhathini zobunzima, kubalulekile ukufuna ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo futhi ungabhekane nesimo uwedwa. Ukwabelana ngesimo nabantu obathembayo kungaletha impumuzo enkulu futhi kunikeze imibono ehlukene yokuthi ungayixazulula kanjani inkinga. Nazi ezinye izincomo zokufuna ukwesekwa ngokomzwelo nokwabelana ngalesi simo:
- Khomba abantu abathenjwayo: Bheka labo bangani, umndeni noma osebenza nabo obathemba ngokuphelele. Kubalulekile ukuthola abantu abaqondayo, abanozwela nabazimisele nikeza ukwesekwa emocional.
- Hlela imihlangano yomuntu siqu noma ebonakalayo: Hlela imihlangano nabantu abathenjwayo, kungaba mathupha noma ngamakholi noma amakholi wevidiyo. Ukuthintana ubuso nobuso kungase kududuze ngokukhethekile, kodwa uma ingekho, ubuchwepheshe bezokuxhumana bungasisondeza kwabathandekayo bethu.
- Vula inhliziyo yakho futhi wabelane ngemizwa yakho: Lapho uhlangana nabantu obathembayo, vuleleka futhi uthembeke ngemicabango nemizwa yakho. Veza okukukhathazayo nemizwa yakho ngaphandle kokwesaba ukwahlulelwa. Ukuzivumela ukuthi ube sengozini kungakha isimo sokusekelana nokuqondana.
Ekugcineni, ingakusiza ukucubungula imizwa yakho, uthole izeluleko, futhi uthole izixazululo ezingaba khona zenkinga. Ungawubukeli phansi umthelela omuhle ukusekelwa okuvela kubantu abakukhathalelayo okungaba nawo. Khumbula ukuthi ukucela usizo akulona uphawu lobuthakathaka, kodwa kuwuphawu lwesibindi nokuhlakanipha kokufuna izixazululo ezihlangene.
9. Cabangela ukusebenzisa izinyathelo zomthetho ukuze uxoshe indoda ethathekile
Uma uzithola usesimweni lapho indoda izifela ngawe futhi ufuna isixazululo, ukucabangela ukusebenzisa izinyathelo zomthetho kungaba inketho ephumelelayo. Lezi zinyathelo zingakunikeza isivikelo esidingekayo futhi ziqinisekise ukuphepha kwakho. Nazi ezinye izinyathelo ongazilandela:
1. Qoqa bonke ubufakazi nobufakazi: Ngaphambi kokuthatha noma yiziphi izinyathelo zomthetho, kubalulekile ukuthi uqoqe bonke ubufakazi obubonisa ukuthatheka nokuhlukumeza ohlangothini lwendoda okukhulunywa ngayo. Lokhu kungase kuhlanganise imilayezo yombhalo, ama-imeyili, amarekhodi ezingcingo, ukuhlolwa kokulandelela ezinkundleni zokuxhumana, izithombe nanoma yibuphi obunye ubufakazi obubalulekile. Lobu bufakazi buzobalulekile ukusekela icala lakho.
2. Xhumana nommeli okhethekile ngokuhlukumeza: Kunconywa ukuthi ufune iseluleko sezomthetho kummeli okhethekile emacaleni okuhlukumeza. Ummeli uzokwazi ukukunikeza isiqondiso mayelana nezinyathelo ezingokomthetho ezitholakala endaweni yakho kanye nokuthi ungaqhubeka kanjani. Kuzokusiza uqonde amalungelo akho kanye nezinketho zomthetho ongakhetha kuzo.
3. Cabangela ukucela umyalelo ovimbelayo: Umyalelo wokuvinjelwa yisinyathelo esingokomthetho esingacelwa ukuze uqhelelane nawe. Lo myalelo ungase umenqabele ukuthi asondele kuwe noma axhumane nawe. Kudingeka ukwethula ubufakazi obuqoqwe enkantolo ukuze kutholwe lo myalelo. Uma umyalelo usukhishiwe, kubalulekile ukwazisa iziphathimandla ezifanele futhi uqinisekise ukuthi uyalandelwa.
10. Qoqa ubufakazi bese ubhala ngokuziphatha okucindezelayo
Kulesi sigaba, inqubo ye. Ukuze kuxazululwe le nkinga ngempumelelo, kubalulekile ukulandela lezi zinyathelo:
1. Qaphela futhi urekhode ukuziphatha okucindezelayo: Kubalulekile ukugcina irekhodi elinemininingwane yokuziphatha okuqaphile okuphawulwe. Lokhu kubandakanya ukuqaphela imvamisa, ubude besikhathi kanye nanoma imaphi amanye amaphethini afanelekile. Ukubuka kufanele kuhambisane futhi kube nomgomo.
2. Sebenzisa amathuluzi okubhala imibhalo: Kunamathuluzi amaningi awusizo okubhala ngokuziphatha okucindezelayo. Ezinye zazo zihlanganisa idayari yokuziphatha, amashidi okungena, nezinhlelo zokusebenza zokulandelela. Lawa mathuluzi azosiza ukuqoqa ulwazi olunembile futhi alandelele ukuqhubeka kwesikhathi.
11. Thola incwadi yesivimbelo uma kunesidingo
Uma ubhekene nesimo sokuhlukumeza noma sodlame, ukuthola umyalelo wokuvinjelwa kungase kube isinyathelo sokuvikela esidingekayo. Ngezansi, sikunikeza umhlahlandlela wesinyathelo ngesinyathelo ukuze ucele umyalelo wokuvinjelwa futhi ngaleyo ndlela uvikele ukuphepha kwakho:
1. Bhala ubufakazi: Qoqa noma yibuphi ubufakazi obusekela icala lakho, okuhlanganisa imilayezo yombhalo, ama-imeyili, izingodo zezingcingo, izithombe noma amavidiyo. Le mibhalo izobaluleka ukukhombisa isidingo somyalelo wokuvinjelwa.
2. Xhumana neseluleko sezomthetho: Funa iseluleko sommeli womyalelo wokuvikela. Bazokuqondisa ezinyathelweni ezingokomthetho okufanele uzilandele futhi bakusize uqonde amalungelo akho. Ukwengeza, bazolungisa imibhalo edingekayo ukuze bethule udaba lwakho enkantolo.
12. Amathiphu okugcina ukuphepha komuntu siqu ngesikhathi sokuhlukana
Ezimweni zokuhlukana, kubalulekile ukubeka phambili nokuqinisekisa ukuphepha komuntu siqu. Nawa amanye amathiphu okugcina indawo ephephile phakathi nale nqubo:
- Gcina ubumfihlo ekuxhumaneni kwakho: Sebenzisa amaphasiwedi aqinile kumadivayisi akho izinto zikagesi kanye nezinkundla zokuxhumana. Gwema ukwabelana ngolwazi lomuntu siqu olubucayi ezinkundleni zomphakathi futhi usebenzise amathuluzi okubhala ngemfihlo uma kungenzeka.
- Gada amanethiwekhi wakho wokuxhumana nomphakathi: Buyekeza futhi ulungise izilungiselelo zobumfihlo kumaphrofayela akho, unciphise ukufinyelela kwabantu abangaziwa. Gwema ukwabelana ngemininingwane mayelana nendawo yakho noma izinhlelo zesikhathi esizayo, njengoba lokhu kungase kubeke ukuphepha kwakho engcupheni.
- Yiba nombuthano wokusekela: Funa ukusekelwa abangane nomkhaya othembekile. Yabelana ngolwazi ngesimo sakho futhi ucele ukukusekela ngokomzwelo nangokokusebenza. Dala uhlelo lokuphepha oluhlanganisa abathintwayo abezimo eziphuthumayo nezindawo eziphephile ongaya kuzo uma kudingeka.
Además, te recomendamos:
- Shintsha imikhuba yakho: Ukushintsha imikhuba yakho ngendlela ongalindelekile kungaba isu elisebenzayo lokuvikela izimo eziyingozi. Gwema ukuvakashela izindawo ezifanayo njalo futhi usungule izikhathi ezingahleliwe zemisebenzi yakho yansuku zonke.
- Yazisa iziphathimandla: Uma uzwa sengathi ukuphepha kwakho kusengozini, ungangabazi ukuxhumana neziphathimandla ezifanele. Bazise ngesimo sakho futhi ucele usizo nokuvikelwa kwabo uma kunesidingo.
- Gcina irekhodi lezehlakalo: Bhala noma yiziphi izehlakalo ezifanele noma izehlakalo ezenzeka phakathi nenqubo yokususa. Lokhu kuzoba usizo njengobufakazi uma kwenzeka udinga ukusebenzisa izinyathelo zomthetho esikhathini esizayo.
Khumbula ukuthi isimo ngasinye sihlukile, ngakho-ke kubalulekile ukuhlola izimo zakho futhi uzivumelanise nezimo lawa macebiso ecaleni lakho elithile. Ukuphepha kwakho nokuphila kahle kubalulekile, futhi ukuba nohlelo kanye nezinyathelo zokuphepha ezifanele kungenza umehluko phakathi nale nqubo.
13. Phinda ulawule futhi uzinike amandla ngemva kokuxosha indoda ethathekile
Kungaba inqubo eyinselele, kodwa kubalulekile ukuqinisekisa ukuphepha kwakho kanye nokuphila kahle ngokomzwelo. Nawa amanye amasu nezenzo ongazithatha ukuze uphinde uthole amandla empilweni yakho futhi wakhe kabusha ukuzethemba kwakho ngemva kwesipiliyoni esinzima kangaka.
1. Hlola ukuphepha kwakho siqu: Into yokuqala okufanele uyenze ukuqinisekisa ukuthi uphephile ngokomzimba. Cabangela ukushintsha izingidi, ukucela usizo kubangani noma umndeni, noma ngisho nokuxhumana neziphathimandla uma uzizwa usongelwa. Ungakubukeli phansi ukubaluleka kokuthatha izinyathelo ezibambekayo ukuze uzivikele.
2. Beka imikhawulo eqinile: Kubalulekile ukuchaza nokudlulisa imingcele yakho ngokucacile. Kwenze kucace ukuthi awuzimisele ukugcina noma yiluphi uhlobo lokuxhumana nomuntu othathekile futhi uvimbele noma yiluphi uhlobo lokuxhumana azama ukulusungula. Hlala uqinile esinqumweni sakho futhi ungavumeli ukucindezelwa noma ukuxhashazwa.
3. Funa ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo: Ungesabi ukufuna ukusekelwa ngokomzwelo phakathi nalolu hlelo. Khuluma nabangane obathembayo noma ucabange ukujoyina iqembu lokusekela lapho ungakwazi ukwabelana ngolwazi lwakho futhi uthole ukwesekwa okudingekayo. Ukwesekwa ngokwengqondo kungabaluleka ukukusiza ukuthi ululame futhi uphinde uthole ukuzethemba kwakho.
14. Funa usizo lochwepheshe ukuze unqobe noma yikuphi ukuhlukumezeka ngokomzwelo okuhlobene
Uma uke wabhekana nanoma yiluphi uhlobo lokuhlukumezeka ngokomzwelo futhi uzama kanzima ukukunqoba, ukufuna usizo lochwepheshe kuyisinyathelo esibalulekile enqubweni yakho yokululama. Uchwepheshe oqeqeshwe endaweni yezempilo yengqondo uzokunikeza ukwesekwa namathuluzi adingekayo ukuze ulawule futhi unqobe imiphumela engokomzwelo yokuhlukumezeka.
Ukwelashwa kuyindlela ephumelelayo yokubhekana nokuhlukumezeka ngokomzwelo. Umelaphi wokuhlukumezeka angakusiza ukuthi ubone futhi ucubungule imizwa nemicabango engemihle ehambisana nomuzwa wakho obuhlungu. Ukwelashwa kungakunikeza indawo ephephile, esekelayo lapho ungakwazi khona ukuveza imizwa yakho ngokukhululekile futhi usebenzele ukunqoba imiphumela yokuhlukumezeka.
Kunezindlela zokwelapha ezihlukene zokwelapha ukuhlukumezeka ngokomzwelo, njengokwelashwa kokuziphatha kwengqondo (CBT), ukwelashwa kokucubungula kwengqondo (CPT), kanye nokunyakaza kwamehlo kanye nokwelapha kabusha (EMDR). Lezi zindlela zigxile ekulungiseni imicabango engemihle kanye nezimpendulo ezingokomzwelo ezihlobene nokuhlukumezeka.
Kulesi sihloko, sihlole ngokuningiliziwe nangokuqondile amasu ahlukene nezincomo zokugcina indoda ethathekile. Kuwo wonke la makhasi, sixoxe ngokubaluleka kokubeka imingcele ecacile, ukuxhumana ngokuphumelelayo, nokufuna ukusekelwa kwangaphandle uma kudingeka.
Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi isimo ngasinye sihlukile futhi singadinga izindlela ezithile. Kodwa-ke, amasu avezwe kulesi sihloko anikeza uhlaka oluqinile lokubhekana nenkinga yokuthatheka.
Khumbula, ukuphepha komuntu siqu kufanele ngaso sonke isikhathi kube yinto ehamba phambili futhi, ezimweni ezimbi kakhulu, kuyalulekwa ukuthi ufune usizo lochwepheshe abangochwepheshe bodlame lobulili noma ipsychology.
Ekugcineni, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi wonke umuntu ufanelwe ukuhlonishwa, ukuzimela kanye nenkululeko. Uma othile ehlangabezana nokuthatheka okungalindelekile, kubalulekile ukufuna usizo futhi uzikhiphe esimweni ukuze uvikele ubuqotho bomzwelo nomzimba wawo wonke umuntu ohilelekile.
Ukugwema ukuthatheka akuwona umsebenzi olula, kodwa ngolwazi, ukwesekwa, kanye nesinyathelo esisheshayo, kungenzeka ukuthi uhambe ebuhlotsheni obunobuthi futhi uthole ukulingana nokuthula kwengqondo okudingekayo ukuze siye phambili. Qiniseka ukuthi usendaweni ephephile futhi uzungezwe abantu abakuhloniphayo nabakwazisayo inhlalakahle yakho.
Sengiphetha, sethemba ukuthi lesi sihloko sinikeze ukuqonda okuphelele nokusebenzayo kokuthi ungaxosha kanjani indoda ethathekile. Ulwazi oluvezwe lapha lungaba isiqalo esibalulekile salabo abafuna ukunqoba isimo sokuthatheka okungafunwa. Khumbula, njalo ukwazisa ukuphepha kwakho nokuphila kahle.
Ngingu-Sebastián Vidal, unjiniyela wekhompyutha ozifelayo ngobuchwepheshe kanye ne-DIY. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ngingumdali we tecnobits.com, lapho ngabelana khona ngezifundo zokwenza ubuchwepheshe bufinyeleleke kakhudlwana futhi buqonde wonke umuntu.